Suicide: A Pain That Never Leaves the Air and Follows Survivors Wherever They Go

Narrative by Sabriya Dobbins, Founder of Project Passport

I attended the Survivors Walk by Triangle Survivors of Suicide for families and friends of those who have committed suicide with my team member Orlando Aguilar and this day I can never forget. Upon arrival, I was greeted with smiles and welcomes. Buttons, banners, and tees all showing the faces of those who have been lost to suicide distributed around the open field, adorning the groups of people. Balloons preparing to float with messages to those whose broken souls could not be recovered.

Every conversation met with, “oh yes I lost my son or daughter.” Every eye contact met with, “Thank you for being here because it means a lot to me.” I felt that I could not breathe because while there were so many positive smiles in the crowd, the feeling of pain could not be shaken. The absolutely shredded hearts of the parents, friends, and family members of these never forgotten souls could be traced in the air.

Inspirational music played in the background. Voices filled the air. Hugs given over and over. Nods of “I know” with no words to follow. One woman tearfully spoke about the loss of her marine son to suicide a few years ago. She walked up and hugged me so tight that I felt chills. I hugged her tighter. She wept in my arms and in that two minutes, it felt like our souls were talking even though we had not said a word. She looked up at me, showed me his photo, nodded, and walked away. The heaviness of the air was unbreakable, and I watched her torn heart whisk away.

Another broken young woman shared the loss of not only her sister but her mother to suicide too. One lady had only lost her son just six months ago. There was not a dry eye in the crowd as the people spoke.

Watch a news broadcast interviewing some of the event attendees.

What do you say to these families? How do you serve these people who feel a pain, shame, regret, and grief that is unexplainable unless you are part of the experience? One that no one wants to ever experience.

Words that I never will forget from a grieving mother: “I am not supposed to be here. This is a group that I did not want to be a part of [survivors of suicide victims].”

A few stats that you must know. In 2017, suicide was the second leading cause of death in ages 10-34. It is the 10th leading cause of death overall. Suicide is 100% preventable. We need to radically change how we fight this fight.

Every hour, we lose 6 more beautiful souls to suicide. Suicide is breaking us.

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Project Passport is a proactive mental wellness company that aims to bring mental wellness retreats, workshops and other services to company teams. We also help women create joy in their lives every step of the way. To learn more about our company retreats and services, click here. To learn more about our tribe community for women, click here. Our travel retreats will resume in the future as the world reopens.