In Honor of Suicide Prevention Day and Those We Have Lost
by Sabriya Dobbins, Founder of Project Passport
In truth, suicide prevention should take place every single day. The fact that there is a day to bring awareness is so important, however the goal is creating a ripple effect where people think of one another every day. Suicide has become a rampant taker of lives that has no regard for age, ethnicity, economic status, or personality. Suicide comes in one too many shapes and forms. Suicide is a debilitating loss for those victim to it and those who loved the victims. We all are victims to suicide even if we were not the life that was lost.
One statement burns in each of our hearts on a daily basis when it comes to suicide: “I never saw it coming. He or she was such a happy person.” However, many of us fail to realize that what is under the iceberg is much larger and complex than what we see on top of the water. Honestly, do we even want to know what is below the surface of the people around us? Are we willing to tap deeply into ourselves and open our minds to the experiences of others? Or in terms of Brené Brown, renowned researcher of vulnerability and courage, are we willing to be empathetic to the thoughts and feelings of others, even when it is hard for us?
We are so drowned in our own biases, thoughts, and assumptions that we are getting to a place where we are struggling to connect with those that live in the world among us—even those we are close to. These blinders we walk in cause us to miss the signs and miss the underlying emotions behind the words of someone walking the tightrope of despair. It is all of our responsibilities to put judgement aside and to listen. We are each other’s keeper. One common thread that our society shares is the knowledge that death is the end of our physical presence. Knowing that, we should all be working tirelessly to prevent losses of life at the hands of suicide.
Many people are afraid when they find out a loved one is considering suicide. There are various guides to help with the process of handling the situation. A few key steps from Mental Health First Aid are as follows:
Get clarification on what the person is feeling. Ask questions and try to see where the person stands. What is triggering the situation? How much have they planned their suicide? What are they feeling in the moment?
If you learn that they are in a high risk state, never leave them on their own. Many people refuse to get medical help because they do not want a record of suicidal thoughts or they are afraid of being labeled. You have to disarm the thought process by explaining that being alive triumphs any consequence of help. Often times, support professionals will keep records confidential if they are able to get the person in a stable space.
Once again, reassurance is key to helping the person. If they know they are not alone and that suicidal thoughts are not foreign, the feeling of alienation is curbed. The person feels like they still fit in this world despite their pained feelings to end their life. Belonging is a critical aspect of our being.
Finally, guide them into a place of support. Even if the situation turns out not to be “high risk,” treat it is a continuous process. No one is “cured” of suicidal thoughts because they can reappear for any reason. By helping the individual find a regular support professional like a therapist or coach, they are able to check in on their mental wellness and consistently address any concerns they may be facing.
If we could remove the fear in the suicide discussion, then we could allow people to speak up more. We need to refuse to treat suicide as a contagion and take it on armed with compassion and understanding. Today and every day, we challenge you to have the courage to hear the true feelings of others and the empathy to show them that they are not alone.
To those we have lost from suicide, we learn from the losses so that we can work hard to ensure they never happen to anyone else. We remind ourselves that those lost were victim to the suicide, yet that term does not define the person. We commit to disarming those with suicide in their hearts with open minds and ears. We will STOP suicide as it is the most preventable form of death. We will not let the lives lost be lost in vain.
Suicide Prevention Help:
National Suicide Prevention Hotline: 1-800-273-8255
HopeLine: 877-235-4525 (local to NC)
Visit https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ for more support resources.
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Project Passport is a mental empowerment retreat and event company created to help women connect with one another and gain the tools to improve their lives in the best way possible. Each retreat experience has a unique theme with carefully designed activities to help participants grow and experience transformation. We are making mental wellness the norm, one retreat at a time. Learn more at project-passport.com.