The Day My Sky Fell Through the Ceiling
Opinion Piece by Project Passport Founder, Sabriya Dobbins
In a prior blog post, I talked about the impact of death on my decision to move forward to create Project Passport. However, I did not give the whole story of it touching my life back in 2017. I am going to share a short story of how my life changed forever.
As a pre-cursor, I have experienced the death of family before however I did not speak with these members as often. The subject of this story is someone I had only seen days before her departure and we spoke all the time as she lived right in my hometown, Fayetteville, NC. I lived with her as a small child and when I got in trouble in elementary and middle school, at her house I landed.
This story I am about to tell you is something that I will never forget. Every moment and feeling, I can relive like it was yesterday.
Thursday, March 2, 2017 (afternoon)
I sat with my dad as we had a vibrant conversation next to my grandma Hermine while she lay in a hospital bed. She had been facing several health issues over the last year and the doctors had not been able to pinpoint the cause. We found ourselves constantly frustrated with the multiple diagnoses and at one point, she had become totally incoherent but with the grace of prayer, she returned to her old self.
I had skipped school from NC State University to see her because I knew that I would be leaving for Dominican Republic that weekend. I wanted to be sure that I told her all about it since she loved to travel herself. I would always bring her back a magnet everywhere I traveled. I remember talking to her about my now fiancé, Taylor, whom she loved so much. Telling her that we would be getting married in a few years so I needed her around to help. I also talked to her about my then career plans to become a professor. My dad kept trying to make her comfortable and I bantered at him on behalf of my somewhat eerily quiet grandmother, telling him to leave her be. I know I spent an hour or so there keeping her smiling and eventually said my goodbyes.
Unbeknownst to me, it would be the last time I would see her beautiful smiling face again.
Wednesday, March 8, 2017 (morning)
I had been in the Dominican Republic for almost a whole week volunteering to help the community children learn English. Learning English would help them in obtaining tourism jobs as it is the number one industry there. I sat on the outdoor lunch bench with my fellow travelers and a few silly students. That is when my phone rang (thank God for WiFi). I happily answered as my dad was Skyping me. He was breaking up so I kept hearing, “Sab—can you—hear – hello? Sab—your--.” Like magic, the static cleared, and I heard the hardest words I have ever heard, “Your grandmother passed away.”
My entire heart fell to the ground. My breath ripped from my body. My awareness of the world around me fading slowly. I stood up and it was like I was spinning 100 miles per hour and all I could hear were blurred voices. With my hearing distorted and my eyes blurry, somehow, I ended up outside the gates of the school with a good friend I had made. I was hysterical. I literally had to be reminded to breathe. I felt that the entire earth had shifted on its axis, yet everyone else had no idea. The sky had fell through the ceiling of my soul. It was one of the worst moments of my life.
Aftermath
I finished the remaining few days of the trip numbly. I felt beyond helpless as I was thousands of miles away. I returned home to find that she had already been cremated. I would never be able to physically touch her again.
Today, my chest tightens as I type this because there is no fixing a broken heart from loss. There will always be a hole where she belongs in my heart. My company, Project Passport, is not just for my dreams, but it is for her. It is for the world travels she did not get a chance to do during her retirement. It is for me to still bring back magnets to my amazing grandpa who is still living in the family home. It is because I know she would be so proud that I rebelled against the standards and became an entrepreneur.
What I loved about her most was her daring soul. My favorite stories she told were when she boycotted Walmart and purposely used the wrong water fountain during the days of segregation. She is why I am the sharp-tongued advocate for people that I am and the reason why I cannot wait to shake up the travel world and the lives of people like never before.
In loving memory of Hermine Jones Dobbins, February 14, 1942 -March 8, 2017
My grandfather, grandmother Hermine, myself, and my brothers and cousins. Christmas, December 2016.
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Project Passport is a proactive mental wellness company that aims to bring mental wellness retreats, workshops and other services to company teams. We also help women create joy in their lives every step of the way. To learn more about our company retreats and services, click here. To learn more about our tribe community for women, click here. Our travel retreats will resume in the future as the world reopens.